If you want something done...
A quick google tells me that the originator of the now-famous maxim, "If you want something done right, do it yourself" was Charles-Guillaume Étienne. Personally I prefer Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg's slightly less fussy approach: "If you want something done, do it yourself".
Pontificating aside this report comes to you as a result of rumour and hearsay, so may not be entirely accurate. Indeed, the reader may be surprised to read of (spoiler alert) Henry losing, Charlie not making a meal of matters, and Jerry deftly avoiding both an endgame and a draw.
Henry began by playing solidly against a presumably expected Catalan from Chris. After some c-pawn captures, Chris had a slight space advantage on the queenside while Henry had gained control of the centre at the cost of a gambit pawn. Richard, filling in on board two for an ever-lazy Chris, took a cautious approach against one of Dominic's many uncommon openings and found himself with an awkward light-squared bishop. Nigel's game with John was well worth playing through again. This is certainly one for which the engine should be left off to see what variations you can come up with on your own. Within a few moves, both sides were trying to one-up the offered material stakes in return for the initiative.
Charlie launched confidently into an binding attack against Ravi's Sicilian and it wasn't long until a Nc3-d5-e7+ trick eventually lead to the win of black's weak d-pawn. Despot Jerry had a similar game to Charlie though he managed to keep his d-pawn more secure and started to lock up the position. In response, Manuel took all the kingside squares. Mike was trying a new opening and despite Alan's excellent opening play, found himself with a slight edge in the mid-game.
After some quick play both Charlie and Mike notched wins for the club which put the score at a very healthy 2-0. The rest of the games were to take considerably longer. Richard had freed his queenside but the game had plenty of play left. Henry had gone for an awkward combination which compelled Chris into attacking. With the position already difficult Chris uncorked a double bishop pseudo-sacrifice and seemed to be swapping off for a straight-forward endgame. The fireworks in Nigel's game were also calming down proving ex-University president Jack Paton right when he stated that, "All interesting games end in draws".
After some shuffling waiting moves, Jerry was unfortunate enough to miss a checking rook fork and resigned on the spot. Nigel's game ended in a draw immediately afterwards and Chris simplified Henry's endgame to earn the point. 2½-2½.
The last game was now in a time scramble. While Richard had gained a definite edge, in the rush Dominic may have missed some opportunities to stir up complications and Richard was able to win with a series of nice tactics to take a rook. The position had no tricks left and Dominic threw in the towel.
The A-team may have been a little lucky to scrape the win, but it's another win which will keep them top of the table.
To end with one final quote, I'd like to nab one from closer to home. In the sagely words of Ian Pickup, "Clearly, based on this performance, the Bs are now clear favourites to win the league".